PROBLEM SOLVING AND DECISION-MAKING

One of the greatest difficulties of long-distance caregiving is being asked to solve problems and make decisions for someone who, until recently, was very much in control and self-sufficient.  Many people in need of assistance will fight fiercely to maintain their independence.  Sadly, as their mental acuity lessens, it may become easier to manage their care.  At that point, the caregiver will have to rely on his or her own and others' knowledge of the care recipient's preferences, wishes, and desires.

The care recipient should be asked to participate in the decision-making process to the greatest extent possible.  It is important to understand your relative's emotional status and intellectual functioning so that the extent to which he or she can be meaningfully involved can be determined.  When decisions are made without the participation of the person who must live with the consequences, the results can be devastating.